Sooooo I am going home today :( It feels so weird that I am, it doesn't feel right!! I have been at my boyfies for over a month and I am used to it, I have a routine and I am settled in and used to sleeping next to him every night and waking up next to him every morning and I won't be able to do that any more :( I feel so terribly sad, I cried last night, I will probably cry a lot today. I have to leave his house in 3 hours and I really don't want to, I want to stay here, screw college! But I can't, I have to carry on with college and try and get decent A Levels. It just feels so wrong going back now, this feels like my home, and I don't want to leave. I will be terribly sad for a while most probably as this is the longest I have stayed at my boyfies in a while and it feels like I am ripping myself apart going home. Home. What is home? Home is where the heart is right? But my heart is with my boyfie :( How can I leave my heart and carry on with life. I am sure I will find away but its going to suck. HARD. I won't see him till the end of October, and then only for a week. Its coming on now to 4 and a half years together and we have been doing this for four and a half years. It has to be time to stop moving up and down now and stay in one place? I wish I could, but if I didn't go home I would let a lot of people down, upset people and piss people off. And I am scared of doing that but my heart tells me screw them, your boyfie is the most important person. And he is, but I just can't stay, we'd both get into trouble. It hurts and it won't go away :(
Sorry for emo post
ngawww babe! i can imagine what it's like for you :( must be really tough
ReplyDeletehope you'll be okay and i'm sure you'll get to be with him again before you know it! time flies
xx
Awww... :( I know how you feel and it is very very hard!!! I do hope everything goes well and before you know it, you will be staying at your darlings place a gain... cheer up :)
ReplyDeleteAwwwwwwww *big hug*
ReplyDeleteWow though, four years is such a long time, it's so impressive!
So you couldn't just do your A levels via a long distance education online course? Are you sure there are no alternatives? I hope you two can figure something out, I'm a hopeless romantic and hate to see two lovers torn appart!
Really hope things work out sweetie :)
*big hugs*
Love
Harlow
xxx
Oh bubs you two sound soooo close it's horrible to hear you have to leave! If you concentrate on the good times you've had with him instead of how long it is til you see him again I'm sure the time will pass sooner than you realise! Chin up and smile =)
ReplyDelete..xX
hi, thanks for following. ^^
ReplyDeletebytheway, YOU'RE SO CUTE!
:( i wish I could stay over my bf's house, but explainignt at to my parents would probs send them into a heart attack :(
ReplyDeletei think if you move in permenatly and show everyone ur seriousness (which i think you have with it being over 4 years with this hard situation) people wont be pissed but will respect ur decision?
Aw honey! I know how you feel. :( My boyfriend lives in Hawaii and I visit a couple times a year and we get to be together for a bit and whenever I have to leave for Japan, I just want time to stop so I could stay with him. :(((
ReplyDeleteThanks for the comment! I haven't been on chictopia for so longggg. but i'll try and check i later :3
Sorry i'm in a rush right now but i just wanted to comment on this hehe :D
There there now... :) i hope you dont feel so sad anymore <3 im sure time will fly...and its october!! (mine and bf bday too ^__^)
ReplyDeletei know how hard it is to be away... :( i havent seen my bf in almost 2 years... o.O believe it? i cant either...which kinda sucks when i think about it now
cheer up sweety :) im sure he'll be thinking of you everyday